When Fashion Goes Awry

I love awards shows. I mean, I don't ever really watch them, but I love to look at the red carpet pictures online after the show to see what everybody wore to the gala events. I am NEVER disappointed. There are always photos of beautiful people in beautiful clothes, like these:

In a gown reminiscent of Halle Berry's 2002 Oscar gown (and created by the same designer - Elie Saab), Rihanna is a stunner in this wine colored creation with strategically placed foliage. It's demure and risky, yet classy, and she pulls the look off perfectly. Very nice.

And look at Taylor Swift, will ya?! She's all grown up! Love the hair, love the dress, love the whole look. Her stylist should be applauded. An elegant, mature look for the cute little country diva... good!

While there are many who show up looking fabulous, though, there are equally appalling outfits. And this is where the fun starts.

Here are last night's top fashion disasters, to be filed in the "What Were They Thinking?" category...

This is Kesha. I don't know anything about her, except that my daughter and stepson sing her songs at the top of their lungs when we are all in the car together. That's it. That's all I know. But based on this outfit, I'd have to say that she enjoys Halloween so much she decided to wear her costume to the show. I think it's pretty creative that she was able to turn what probably could have been a nice long black dress into something Mama Adams wouldn't wear even on a bad day by just topping the bodice with a shredded trash bag. And I cannot imagine how long it took her to get all the hair products - spray, gel, wax, cement - out of that hair. Seriously... what was she thinking when she looked in the mirror? "Let's see... I'll just top it off with the perfect shade of black lipstick and some eyebrow jewels and VOILA! I'll be the hit of the red carpet!!!"

Wow.

Believe it or not, that wasn't the worst. This was. Meet Nicki Minaj.

I don't understand this. Is it a dress? Is it a bug costume? Did she buy it this way or did she do this herself? Did she get a little carried away with the bedazzler? Will a bedazzler even DO this? It looks as if this may have once been a classic salmon colored sheath dress. But then somebody got a little crazy with gold pieces of armor. I see a gold rib cage, several pairs of gold wings, maybe a snake at the bottom(?) and perhaps a few hood ornaments scattered throughout. At first I thought this thing had green sleeves. Then I looked closer and realized it was her hair (wig) with the tips painted green. I guess she was trying to tie the whole look together. As my daughter would say, however... epic fail. I'm not sure what look she was going for, but this is what it brought to mind:

You know, I can look at old pictures of myself (mostly from the '80's) and truly cringe. I have made one fashion mistake after another, as most of us have. But this beats all I've ever seen.

I hope 20 years from now a reporter shows these gals these photos and asks "What were you thinking?" And I hope I'm around to read their responses.

Again... wow.